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Published: June 23, 2017
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New York has always been the epicenter of New Wave, pun intended. But in the past two decades, New York has also been at the forefront of casual sex. As opposed to the previous Puritanical regime of monogamy, in the last decade, casual sex is the mainstream. Casual sex is accepted in all walks of life and in all corners of society. Casual sex is perceived as vulgar or lowbrow, but if that’s the case, why is it that there is a stigma for sexual fidelity? Why can’t you be single if you just want to have sex with someone, but not love them?
“I would venture a guess that the reason monogamy is so entrenched in society is because in periods where sexual liberty has been relatively low, people need to reaffirm monogamous commitments,” says Beth Noveck, a computer scientist who co-wrote the book The Internet At Work. She believes that, by returning to the more primal bond that can only be found in a committed relationship, people need to have something to fall back on if the situation doesn’t go according to their plan.
“If that’s what gives them that sense of stability, then I think it becomes deeply ingrained in our culture.”
In a world full of sexual freedom and casual sex, it’s all up to the individual to choose how they want to express themselves sexually. In sex, there are many things to consider, like what you feel about intimacy, where your sexual preferences lie, how much self-control you have, and the probability that you’ll fall in love with your casual sex partner. In order to find a casual sex partner who will align with your personal desires, you need to ask yourself a few questions — and, just like any relationship, not everyone is going to be the right match.
“It’s the atmosphere of abundance, there’s no scarcity,” says Andrew Blecher, a psychologist who works with the fledgling casual sex app Passion Pass. Blecher says that in the past, intimate relationships were much more scarce; everyone was so starved that people had to put their personal needs aside to satisfy others — with the result being that intimacy could be fleeting.
But things have changed. People have more access to various types of partners with different sexual preferences, Blecher says. As a result, intimacy is no longer something that someone has to sacrifice for another person.
It’s why people are enjoying casual sex at an unprecedented
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While we come here prepared for some obvious sexual conversation and/or topics, we certainly don’t want any episodes of awkwardness – and what makes us more nervous than talking about our sex lives, period? Allow us to share some common misconceptions about sex and dating in our culture.
If you’re a fan of the “Woman’s Right to Choose” catch phrase, you may be puzzled to learn that the official statement for Planned Parenthood is “Women’s Rights Are Human Rights”. The goal of the organization is not to say that every woman has a right to choose a fertility procedure, but rather that women have the right to make the choice (if it’s an informed, researched and medical necessity) that best suits them. While we come here prepared for some obvious sexual conversation and/or topics, we certainly don’t want any episodes of awkwardness – and what makes us more nervous than talking about our sex lives, period? Allow us to share some common misconceptions about sex and dating in our culture.
A study by the Journal of Sex Research discovered that most people prefer to use condoms during sex than to use alcohol. In fact, a study by a U.S. Veteran Affairs Medical Center found that 81 percent of soldiers interviewed preferred condoms during sex than alcohol. Alcohol was considered to have both positive and negative effects in all soldiers. On the positive side, alcohol had potential to increase your feelings of love, happiness, intimacy and satisfaction, as well as your mood. On the negative side, drinking can also cause feelings of loneliness, frustration, jealousy and anger, and lead to negative mood. The study discovered that if a soldier caught an STI while using alcohol, they were twice as likely to use a condom than if they weren’t. As a result of the study, a suggestion was proposed to encourage condoms use during sex by changing what can be considered to be the sex-talk voice of how military people interact with other soldiers about sex.
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